by Hazel Mayfield
Fifteen years ago my husband Dan, told me about his desire to preach God's word. My immediate thought was "I am not a preacher's wife," as if they were some separate species. My mind conjured up someone who always wore dresses, never spoke an unkind word, cooked better than anyone else, always had a roast in the oven, entertained more, had the cleanest house, never had bad breath, well you get the point. I was in trouble, because while I could do some things well, I could do nothing perfectly, and very few things at the same time.
I began having talks with myself reasoning that preachers must be human, after all, Dan was going to be one. Therefore their wives and families must be human too, with all the strengths and weaknesses common to humankind. They are not perfect, and are not given an extra dose of spirituality. Since acquiring this "position", I have seen Christians holding similar misconceptions to those I once held, views like "even the preacher's kids didn't know this" or "the preacher's wife didn't attend the committee meeting". My motivation, however, for doing the things I do is not based on who my husband is. My motivation for doing what I do is based on who my Lord is.
God does not require anymore of me now than if my husband were still a salesman. He expects me to use the talents He has given me to glorify Him. He expects that of all of us. Romans 12:4-8 teaches we are individual members of one body with our functions being based on the gifts given to us by God. My service - helping to bring others to Christ, preparing meals, teaching the children's class, training my own children - is based on what I believe my talents are. The wives of preachers don't all have the same gifts. Preacher's wives have varying talents; to try to put them in the same mold has no scriptural basis. I cannot be hired to do the service I gladly do for Christ. I choose to serve God not because I am the preacher's wife but because I am a Christian woman. The God of the Bible is worthy of my service because He loved me enough to send His Son to die for me.
I often tell my children that I require nothing of them because they are the preacher's children. I also tell them I expect a lot from them because we are a Christian family. Christ is our focus and motivation for the service we do.
There are numerous verses I can look to for guidance in my life as a Christian woman, wife, and mother; Titus 2:3-5; 1 Timothy 2:9-15; Proverbs 31:10-31. I can look to many Biblical examples; Hannah, Ruth, Esther, Sarah, and Mary. As long as I keep my focus, study diligently, serve and worship my Savior, I will grow in my effectiveness and usefulness as a Christian.
I am blessed to be the wife of a man who has the only job on earth where the fruits of his labors will go into eternity. I am a preachers wife, but that does not define me; I am a Christian woman.
©2000 Hazel Mayfield.
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